Theme: Building a Godly Marriage Through Divine Love
📖 Key Text:
“Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled…” — Hebrews 13:4
✨ INTRODUCTION
Marriage is not just a relationship — it is a covenant designed by God.
📖 Genesis 2:24
“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”
A successful marriage is not built on feelings alone. It is built on the right kinds of love operating together.
Today, we will explore the four major types of love that must function in every godly marriage:
- Agape – Unconditional love
- Eros – Romantic love
- Phileo – Friendship love
- Storge – Family affection
When these four are balanced, marriage becomes heaven on earth.
1️⃣ AGAPE LOVE — The Foundation of Marriage
📖 Ephesians 5:25
“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.”
Agape is:
- Sacrificial
- Unconditional
- Forgiving
- Patient
Marriage without Agape will not survive storms.
Christ loved the church when the church was imperfect.
In the same way, spouses must love each other beyond weaknesses.
📖 Colossians 3:14
“And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness.”
Agape love says:
- “I choose you every day.”
- “I forgive you.”
- “I will not give up.”
🔑 Why Agape Is Important
Because feelings change.
Agape keeps covenant when emotions fluctuate.
📖 1 Corinthians 13:7-8
“Love beareth all things… endureth all things. Love never fails.”
2️⃣ EROS LOVE — Romantic & Intimate Love
📖 Song of Solomon 8:6-7
“Love is strong as death… Many waters cannot quench love.”
Eros is romantic and physical love between husband and wife.
God created intimacy. It is not sinful within marriage.
📖 Genesis 2:25
“And they were both naked… and were not ashamed.”
📖 1 Corinthians 7:3-5
“Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence…”
Healthy intimacy:
- Builds connection
- Strengthens unity
- Prevents temptation
Romantic love must be:
- Exclusive
- Honorable
- Pure
📖 Proverbs 5:18-19
“Rejoice with the wife of thy youth…”
Marriage without romance becomes dry.
Marriage without boundaries becomes dangerous.
3️⃣ PHILEO LOVE — Friendship in Marriage
📖 Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
“Two are better than one…”
📖 Proverbs 17:17
“A friend loveth at all times…”
Your spouse should not only be your partner — but your best friend.
Phileo love in marriage means:
- Communication
- Laughter
- Shared dreams
- Emotional support
When friendship dies, marriage becomes mechanical.
Good marriages talk.
They listen.
They enjoy each other’s company.
Jesus called His disciples friends (John 15:15).
Friendship deepens connection.
4️⃣ STORGE LOVE — Family Bond & Commitment
📖 Romans 12:10
“Be kindly affectioned one to another…”
Storge is natural affection — family love.
In marriage, it creates:
- Loyalty
- Sense of belonging
- Protective care
📖 1 Timothy 5:8
“But if any provide not for his own… he hath denied the faith…”
Marriage creates a new family unit.
Spouses must prioritize their home above outsiders.
📖 Psalm 127:1
“Except the Lord build the house, they labour in vain that build it.”
💎 THE BALANCE OF ALL FOUR
A marriage with only Eros (romance) but no Agape will collapse during trials.
A marriage with only Agape but no Eros may lack warmth.
A marriage without friendship (Phileo) feels distant.
A marriage without Storge lacks stability.
God designed marriage to operate in all four dimensions.
🔥 COMMON ENEMIES OF LOVE IN MARRIAGE
- Pride — Proverbs 16:18
- Bitterness — Hebrews 12:15
- Lack of forgiveness — Matthew 6:14-15
- Neglect — Song of Solomon 2:15
- Comparison — 2 Corinthians 10:12
🛠 HOW TO GROW LOVE IN MARRIAGE
1️⃣ Pray Together
📖 Matthew 18:19
2️⃣ Forgive Quickly
📖 Ephesians 4:32
3️⃣ Speak Kindly
📖 Proverbs 15:1
4️⃣ Spend Quality Time
📖 Ecclesiastes 9:9
5️⃣ Keep God at the Center
📖 Ecclesiastes 4:12
“A threefold cord is not quickly broken.”
💖 EXAMPLE OF CHRIST & THE CHURCH
Marriage reflects Christ and His church.
📖 Ephesians 5:31-32
Husbands must lead with love.
Wives must respond with respect (Ephesians 5:22-33).
When both walk in love:
- Peace reigns
- Joy increases
- Children are blessed
- Generations are impacted
🙏 CONCLUSION
Marriage is not sustained by beauty.
Not by money.
Not by feelings.
It is sustained by:
- Agape — Commitment
- Eros — Passion
- Phileo — Friendship
- Storge — Family bond
When these operate together, marriage becomes strong, joyful, and God-glorifying.
📖 1 Peter 4:8
“And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.”
🔥 PRAYER POINTS FOR MARRIED COUPLES
- Lord, renew love in my marriage.
- Remove pride and bitterness from our home.
- Restore friendship between us.
- Rekindle passion according to Your will.
- Let our marriage reflect Christ and the Church.
By Julius Denyigba
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